"It snowed last year too: I made a snowman and my brother knocked it down and I knocked my brother down and then we had tea. ~Dylan Thomas"
Sibling's..Is there anyone among us who hasn't sometimes wondered.. "Now how did he or she land here?... couldn't he have been born in Swaziland or Timbuktu? We sometimes feel we cant live with them and most often realise we can't live without them.
If god made man in his own image, I believe siblings have been made as an inverted reflection of who we are. I think the greatest challenge in handling sibling relations is that they know exactly how we think and sometimes even at the same pace, so theres no way we can dodge them. We abuse, curse, kick and swear to kill each other.. and yet we adore, love them so much that we want to be part of everything they do and we wish always the best for each other. I sometimes think I wont ever forgive my sibling when he hurts me but some incidents in life change the way we think and its during these moments we realise how short life is and there is no time and space to hate someone especially the one who is part of "You Inc."
My dads cousins were not on speaking terms for almost 2 years.. Somethings had terribly gone wrong between the brother and sister and they never found the time and need to sit across the table and talk they had their "own" lives to think about, children to raise, spouse to please, and were running the rat race called life.. so the strain in their relation kept deepening and deepening.. In 2007 uncle was diagnosed with cancer.. and he was battling against it.. His sister was shocked and at the same time felt guilty that she never made the attempt to talk it out.. but the damage had already been done.. He was adamant that he would not take the sympathy or love from anyone who wasn't there in his good days and he continued to fight against the deadly disease.. but after a year of struggle he was loosing the battle.. In 2008 May as I stood in the hospital seeing a man in his early 40s inching towards death.. waiting when his eyes would close and overlooked by a family who worried that if he did close his eyes he would never open them again..I saw what life can do to you if you don't value the people around you.. Standing in the corner of the room was his sister crying her heart out.. she had been in that room for almost a day now and her brother didn't even look at her.. she tried to hold his hand but he turned his head away.. she wanted to speak to him but he had nothing more to say.. What could you possibly tell a man who was in his last hours and what would a man tell his sister when he is leaving this world.. words like "sorry", "I love you", "if only", "i didn't mean it "and so on suddenly mean nothing.. and you wish if you get back those lost moments .But you as much as I do that what is gone is gone.. and so did uncle.. leaving behind a sister who will forever live in the pain that she couldn't hear her brother say.. its OK!, I forgive you.. Is there a greater pain than that..
So no matter what.. I have decided , even if my bro knocks me off or I knock him off I would go up to him and say.. hey bro! so hows your life so whats on TV bro.. and he would say cant u see and I would say to my self (feels great to be back.. I love u man..)
